humor Archives

It seems that animals are making headiness these days.

According to the AP there was a real case of Snakes on a Plane in Australia grounding a Quantas Passenger plane. The article , written by ROD McGUIRK states in part: CANBERRA, Australia (AP) — A tiny Asian snake was found on a Qantas Boeing 747 airliner in Australia, leading to 370 passengers being grounded overnight.

Staff found the 20-centimeter (8-inch) Mandarin rat snake in the passenger cabin near the door late Sunday before passengers were due to board the flight bound for Tokyo from Sydney International Airport, Qantas said in a statement Monday.

Australia’s flagship airline said passengers were given hotel rooms and left Sydney on a replacement plane Monday morning. Qantas said the original jet would be fumigated before returning to service in case there were other snakes on board.

Then we have the case of the stinky city and I don’t mean smog!

BUFFALO, N.Y. (AP) — Residents of a Buffalo, N.Y., neighborhood plagued by skunk odors now know what caused the stink: Trapped critters that were shot and stored at a shuttered police station.

The Buffalo News reports (http://bit.ly/18myscv ) that the city’s public works commissioner confirmed Monday that humanely trapped skunks have been taken to an old police station in South Buffalo, where they’re shot and stored in outdoor freezer until they can be incinerated.

Residents say they complained about the smell months ago but were told by city officials that skunks weren’t being killed inside the building. Later, they were told only a few skunks were killed there by lethal injection.

One neighborhood leader has dubbed the community scandal “Skunkgate.”

City officials say they’re looking for new locations for dispatching the nuisance skunks.

A bear walks into a bar….no this isn’t joke it really happened but he was a very well behaved bear and apparently left when asked.

JUNEAU, Alaska (AP) — If only all unwelcome bar guests were this obliging.A black bear walked into the bar at the Alaskan Hotel in downtown Juneau on Monday night.Bartender Ariel Svetlik-McCarthy says she freaked out and yelled, “No bear! Get out! No! You can’t be in here!”The bear complied, leaving the bar within seconds.

And finally , It doesn’t pay to be anti social. Even animals can be “fired”. The Dallas Zoo certainly gave the cranky gorilla plenty of time to mend his ways, 18 years but finally it was time to hand the animal his “pink slip”. The story was reported by the AP this week. An excerpt from their report is included here:

DALLAS (AP) — There will be no rose ceremony for a 430-pound bachelor gorilla that failed to form any meaningful relationships with fellow apes during an 18-year stay at the Dallas Zoo.

Patrick, the 23-year-old Western lowland gorilla known for being gregarious with zoo staff and the public, while being ambivalent toward his female counterparts, has been handed his walking papers. The silverback will be transferred to the Riverbanks Zoo and Garden in Columbia, S.C. where he’ll be allowed more solitude, according to a statement issued Monday by the Dallas Zoo.

And now we will return to our regularly scheduled postings. 🙂

Our best wishes and prayers go out to the Mayor of Talkeetna, AK. It happened Saturday night as the Mayor walked through town. After the attack the Mayor retreated to safety and did not come out of hiding to get treatment until after 11pm.

The Mayor suffered a fractured sternum, a punctured lung and a large gash in his side.

Ok if you followed my Alaska adventures you know that the Mayor of Talkeetna is a yellow feline named Stubbs because he has no tail. Mayor Stubbs is 16 years old and has been the honorary Mayor of Talkeetna for 15 of those 16 years.

As Mayor Stubbs claws his way to recovery at a Wasilla-area vet, let me review a bit of history for you.

Stubbs was discovered in 1n a box of kittens in front of a local general store about 16 years ago. The store manager decided to keep him and named him Stubbs for the missing tail.

About a year later residents were unhappy with the slate of candidates in a mayoral election and thought the cat at the local general store seemed smart enough to hold the job. They banded together with a grass roots write in drive to make Mr. Stubbs the candidate of choice. ..The cat won and like Mayor Menino of Boston, Mayor Stubbs has been running the show ever since.

Mayor Stubbs’ life hasn’t been all catnip and cream, although his constitutes love him, this isn’t his first brush with trouble. About 5 years ago two teenagers with a BB gun shot the Mayor in his backside. One of the BB’s is still there.

Three years ago he hitched a ride on a garbage truck. He finally jumped off at an Alaska Railroad Crossing and had to make his way on foot the 1/2 mile home.

Two years ago he fell into a cold fryer vat at the West Rib Pub. He spent the night at the vet’s when a Dawn dish soap bath couldn’t get him totally clean. He has a reputation of being an adventurous guy. Which, of course, goes with being Alaskan.

In spite of his past mishaps, Mayor Stubbs has never had injuries as severe as he received in this mauling. The Canine Assassin is in hiding and has not been picked up yet by Animal Control but a report is expected to be filed this week. Cats are considered “Free Roaming” but dogs are subject to leash laws.

Reports are that the breathing tubes have been removed and Mayor Stubbs is breathing on his own and has even eaten a little food. He will be allowed visitors sometime today (Thursday). Looks like Mayor Stubbs will be recuperating for quite awhile although we are happy he is alive.