Kitty Shenanigans: The Continuing Saga of Life With Two Cats

 

Cat Wrestling to start the day off right. What more can be in store for me?

The Morning Mayhem Begins

What a morning. My two tiny terrors have been in rare form. Usually the day starts the same way: breakfast for both kitties, followed by a full‑speed race around the condo. I try not to be in my recliner when this happens, because it’s one of the main sections of their racetrack. They’re just as likely to launch off my head — leaving tufts of my gray hair behind — as they are to springboard off the back of the chair. It’s truly a dangerous place to sit once they’re wound up.

The Post‑Race “Recovery” Phase

After that comes the recovery phase. Once they’ve burned off that first burst of morning energy, they each find a spot for a quick nap while they wait for me to clean the litter box. They supervise this process closely. As soon as I finish, they each reclaim a box — I’ll spare you the explanation. Then they get their morning treats, and normally I get a little peace to write, read, or even sneak in a nap of my own.

Balboa, Agent of Desktop Chaos

But today? Today they rewrote the script.

It started with Balboa. As soon as he finished breakfast, he came over to my desk to “see what I was doing.” He stretched out across the desktop, looking perfectly relaxed. That was just to lull me into a false sense of security. The moment I moved my hand from mouse to keyboard, a paw shot out like lightning. He grabbed for the mouse. I grabbed back. My typing came to a halt. Balboa was not deterred. His paw moved from mouse to keyboard, and the next thing I knew, I had a whole blog post of kitty gibberish.

This back‑and‑forth went on for a while. I was getting nothing done, and Balboa was delighted with himself. Fortunately, he has a short attention span and eventually wandered off to find some other form of mischief.

Banner vs. The Fitbit: A Rivalry for the Ages

Enter Banner.

My Fitbit was on the charger — and somehow, Banner knew. My Fitbit is his nemesis. He tries to chew it off my arm, he finds it when I hide it in the medicine cabinet during my shower, and no matter which charging station I use, he senses it. He has some sort of sixth sense for wearable technology.

Thus began my efforts to distract a determined agent of chaos. Banner has a much longer attention span than Balboa, and this was turning into a full morning of distraction. Cat 1, Hooman 0. The Fitbit barely survived.

Eventually, I gave up trying to charge it and put it back on my wrist. Banner gave me a tail flip — the feline equivalent of a rude gesture — followed by a disgusted look before wandering off, muttering under his breath the whole way.

Temporary Peace… Probably

Back to my work… I hope.

I quietly snuck the Fitbit back onto the charger. Both cats finally settled down for their morning nap/recharge cycle. And now I wait, wondering what they’ll dream up next.

Tiger Panther box war

Living with cats is like living with tiny, furry project managers — always supervising, never helpful, and absolutely convinced the world revolves around their schedule.

Banner and Balboa would like you to know this post contains affiliate links. If you buy through them, I may earn a small commission — which they insist should go toward treats, toys, or whatever they’ve decided to knock off the counter next.


 

A Day in the Life of a Cat‑Owned Human

No one sulks better than Balboa

The Nighttime Opera & Ribcage Choreography

Some days, I swear Banner and Balboa hold secret meetings to plan my downfall. Today was one of those days.

After a night of absolutely no sleep — Banner performing his midnight opera and Balboa practicing his interpretive dance across my ribcage — I thought I’d grab a nap. A simple nap. A human right.

But no.

The Recliner Betrayal

The power went out for TMLP’s pole work, which meant my recliner was frozen in the upright position like a stubborn monument. So I crawled back into bed, hoping for ten minutes of peace.

That’s when the chaos began.

Chaos Begins: The Water Fountain Crisis

Banner immediately launched into a full‑volume monologue louder than anything he does at night.

He was deeply offended that his royal water fountain had gone silent.
Back and forth he went, inspecting the spout like a tiny plumber.
A single tap on the bowl confirmed his suspicions — and he still wouldn’t take a sip.

The Feline Olympics (Bed Edition)

Balboa turned the bed into a racetrack, sprinting back and forth like he was training for the Feline Olympics. Nothing I did calmed them. Not petting, not bribery, not pleading with the universe.

1st Nap attempt: Denied.

Bathroom Acoustics: Banner Discovers the Tub Echo

I left the bathroom door open. After all, it wasn’t night time and it’s usually open during the day. Big mistake. Banner redirected his efforts from the water fountain to the medicine cabinet. Then he resumed his serenade in the tub. Cries echoing throughout the apartment.

Balboa Adds Counterpoint

Balboa moved to the headboard, racing back and forth and joined in with counterpoint meows.

 

2nd Nap attempt: Denied.

The Printer Incident: Balboa’s Sneak Attack

Later, once the lights came back and I was trying to work on the printer, Balboa pulled his final stunt of the day: he snuck onto my chair just as I was sitting down.

Squash.
One startled human.
One flattened panther‑cat.
Zero apologies from the guilty party.

Ultimate Sulk Fest: Balboa, Wronged Panther‑Cat.

No one sulks better than Balboa

Life With Cats: Zero Peace, Maximum Love

And so it goes.

Life with cats: no sleep, no naps, no personal space… but somehow, still worth every chaotic minute.


 

🎄 Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree… Your Ornaments Are History

 


Or why I no longer have a Christmas Tree…

 

Challenge Accepted: The Ceiling Tree

We’ve all seen the viral photos: a Christmas tree mounted upside down on the ceiling, with a determined cat gazing up as if to say, “Challenge accepted.” It’s the ultimate test of feline agility. Forget gravity — cats see it as an invitation to defy physics and prove that no ornament is truly safe.

The Cardboard Forest

Why spend hours fluffing branches when cardboard boxes stacked in a pyramid will do? To us, it’s recycling. To cats, it’s a jungle gym. Add a few twinkle lights, and suddenly you’ve created the perfect climbing wall disguised as holiday décor. Bonus: no shattered glass ornaments when the inevitable leap occurs.

Godzilla Kitty Invades the Village

Miniature Christmas villages are meant to be serene, snowy escapes. Enter Buddy, my beloved (and now dearly missed) cat, who once claimed the center of the village like a furry Godzilla. Tiny ceramic houses trembled under his paws, and the townsfolk never stood a chance. It was equal parts adorable and catastrophic — a memory that still makes me smile every season.

 

The Joys of Decking the Halls with Cats

For every toppled ornament and paw‑printed snow scene, there’s laughter and love. Cats remind us that perfection isn’t the goal — joy is. Whether they’re scaling ceiling trees or stomping through villages, they bring their own brand of holiday cheer. And honestly, would Christmas feel complete without a little chaos?