T’was the night before Christmas (almost)

When all through the house 

Not a creature was moving

Not even a mouse.

Not one had a care

(Unless you count the cats attacking the tree…)

We were watching and waiting for UPS to be there.

Extra postage was paid and promises made,

That necessary supplies would be delivered by 5!

At 5:31 A brown truck took a turn.

It went past the condo and on down the street

Away to the window I flew  in a flash

Tore open the shutter  and threw up the sash!

But the truck never stopped.

It just kept on  trucking.

But a trip to the website show lots of nothing!

The driver had delivered but found us not home! (What? Outrage!)

So wrong , so strange, not a bell ever rung!

After calling and screaming and begging a lot,

UPS promised faithfully that I could go to their lot.

The driver would meet me they promised with glee.

So Christmas would be saved after all, we would see.

Yes, I got to pay extra so I could drive to their store (30 miles) (and pick up the package at 9pm at night)

Now silence reigns. No response from their crew , to my request for a refund.

I never get through.

So next time you hear “What can Brown do for you?”

Remember my story…shouldn’t it be “what can Brown do TO you?”

Bah Humbug to you UPS!

Apologizes to Clement Clarke Moore ( author of the Night before Christmas and also Dr, Seuss as I think I started to fall into some “Seussisms” too.